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www.brianandshell.blogspot.com

These are some pictures of the Halloween party we did at my in-laws. It was fun, and I made all the food for it and everything. Don't worry becca, I will include recipes later. its not like I don't have the time...

just a regular veggie tray

A ranch bacon cheeseball

and some awesome smoking punch

and apple jello with gummy worms.

I haven't really been up to much of anything. I found out I was pregnant in the middle of november, and then on Saturday, I spent almost all day in the er. I almost lost the baby. I am still bleeding and am on bedrest until I stop bleeding. I'm still bleeding today, but thankfully, its not very bad. When i first started bleeding, it was like a gushing flow. I don't think I have ever bled that much before. It was really scary.

Ok. So for some recipes I promised Becca

Chicken Pillows

1 can of crescent rolls (they work better if they are room temp)

1-2 cooked chicken breasts, diced small

1 box of stove top stuffing

1 cup of shredded cheddar cheese

Mix the chicken, stuffing and cheese to make the filling.

put a generous spoonful in each crescent roll. wrap around the filling to make a circle.

Roll in milk and then breadcrumbs. Place on a cookie sheet.

Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes or until nice and golden brown.

They are good by themselves, but I really like them smothered with chicken gravy.

Cheese Ball

2 packages cream cheese

1 packet of dry ranch dressing mix

1 small jar of real bacon bits

1 package of shredded cheddar cheese.

Mix the first 3 ingredients with a mixer. Roll in the shredded cheese and refidgerate.

serve cold with crackers.

I'll write some more later. I'm really tired right now, sorry.

I have a LOT of catching up to do...

For our Anniversary this year, we decided to go to Lagoon. Neither one of us has been there in years. It happened to be my bro-in-law's Lagoon day for school, so we got in for way cheap. It was fun, though I really think that as I get older, I don't like thrill seeking rides anymore. I didn't like the Wicked and the Spider and stuff.

They were doing frightmares, obviously.

oh, that is out of order...This was at In N Out

All of us in a haunted junk yard...heh heh.

I heart this one!


Oy. I have millions of pictures to upload, but I haven't taken them off my camera and out them on my computer yet. I've been lazy, very lazy. Anyway, I have to go, my computer is dying...

I got transferred to work in the Murray Sam's for a month. I haven't worked for over a week...the boss there says there is no hours, so today is my first day back, and I think I'm going to quit in a few weeks. As soon as I have found something else. I'm desperate enough that I think i may even take a stupid seasonal job for now until something better comes. I wish I had a job that was reliable and didn't screw me over.

I've been depressed the last little while. It's a lot of bad things happening all once, I guess. I haven't really felt like doing much of anything, or talking to many people.

Crappy cell pics

I know the quality of these are lacking, but these are off my cell phone. These are of that house fire that was on the news on the 2 of Oct. It was literally 5 houses away from us. Coming up from 201, I was beginning to think it was our house that was on fire. it was an interesting night to say the least.

Brian was wanting to watch Lord of The Rings. I am absolutely dying of boredom. These are the longest movies ever. *Sigh*

Anyway, I am happy to say that Brian may have finally found a good job. It's at Easton Sports and it is where my brother-in-law works. It is only temporary for 90 days, but if he does well, they will keep him. He makes more than I do, and it is full time which is great for us. Their health benefits there are pretty deecent, too. I hope this works out for him...these last few months have been the worst we've has as of yet. Having heatlh insurance back will be a good blessing.

Work has been going fairly well lately, too. I am still looking for a better job, but there is almost nothing out there and what is out there, if you have no experience, nobody wants to hire you. I have applied at a bunch of places and I haven't heard back from any. It is frustrating.

Aw. Sad part in the movie...Frodo just told Sam to go home.

I got to go to the dentist and get a crown. My back molar is broken in 5 places and apparently if I don't get it done, it could crumble. I've rarely had a problem with my teeth and it makes me a little nervous...I've never had a root canal. Maybe they'll let me listen to my ipod. I don't like the sound of the drilling. It grosses me out.

Is it just me or has the world gone crazy?

sorry I haven't updates in like, well, FOREVER. I have been busy, I promise, but I will do my best to catch you up. I have like a bazillion pictures to update, but that will have to wait til later. So the last time I posted was when we went to Logan to drop my sister off...and holy lots of pictures I will update later.

I resigned my cell contract and we got new phones. We decided on the Blackberry Curve and to tell you the truth, I'm rather happy with it. Now that I'm used to the full keyboard, I think it the best thing ever.

We also had to go and get Brian's car re-registered and renewed. I really hate inspections and the like because inevitably one of our cars always fails one or the other. Thankfully, all we had to shell out this time was 8 bucks for his windsheild wiper blades. His car is so old (1993) I'm surprised there was nothing worse. Last year we had to fork out almost $600 to get it to pass...stupid exhaust manifold piping. Anyway, it was nice to have one think kinda go right this month.

Now that Brian has quit Toys R Us and is working with me, we can barely afford anything and if we can even pay rent we're feeling lucky. Money has never been this tight for us before, even when I was laid off. It has definately been an interesting few weeks. At least we can pay out tithing which I am glad for. As long as we pay our tithing it seems that we have enough money to pay all of our bills with the exception of rent.

I think I also have an abcessed tooth. My tooth hurts like holy crap all the time and its getting worse. So, I'll need to find a dentist soon and hopefully I can get in within the week. That will be fun...I have no dental insurance and no medical insurance so I'll likely have to pay through the nose. *Sigh* I will likely have to get a root canal and those are expensive. I also need to get my wisdom teeth out. I suspect they are causing ALL of my dental problems of late...Stupid teeth. Who needs them anyways?

Work has been the worst of all though. There is another lead who is making life hell for all of us. I can barely handle talking to her let alone looking at her without having to supress my anger. She is a know it all who doesn't know a thing about anything. Thankfully, I will be transferring to another store and I really hope that the transfer comes soon. This gal kinda got my other boss fired and, well, she has the tendency to piss everyone off.. She makes my life twenty times more difficult than needs be. oh, and she has taken over all my responsibilities. Yeah...real nice. *itch...

In addition to that, my hormones have been all over the place. I'm exhausted all the time and I cried the other night because Brian didn't say good night before he came to bed. Its ridiculous and I think it is tied to my stress at work. Stupid lady from hell. No, I'm not pregnant...having a normal cycle now. It is amazing what stress will do to you. As a result, I'm looking at the job market, again. I hate my job.

I went on a 10 hour bus tour with my sister last weekend. We went along the pony express route and lunched at Camp Floyd. It was actually rather fascinating...the sitting for hours was lame. We went almost to nevada and back to SL. It was interesting and I learned a lot I didn't know. Though this may not sound fun to you guys, I enjoyed it because I like history. Again, like a bazillion pictures i need to post.

There is a stupid dog barking down the street and it is driving me nuts, so I am going to go now.

Mini Vacations Rock!

We took Kim up to Logan yesterday and decided to spend the night. It was great to have a vacation no matter how short it was. We helped kim move in and unpack her dorm room up at USU. It is very tiny and very cramped, but it is college housing. There was a really cute guy that helped her find her room and everything and he was talking with her today...I told her she should totally get her number.

We went to the Logan Temple and saw the Tabernacle there. It is pretty niceup there. Nice enough that i wouldn't mind moving there and going to school myself. We also took a walking tour of historic main street. There is a little zoo in a park there that is mostly birds and turtles, but they do have two cute wallaby's. We went to the local diner for lunch and went to Wal-Mart about 8 times. And we took like a million pictures, but for some reason blogger and facebook both won't let me upload pictures today, so i'll try again.

It really was fun to be able to get away and have a little us time after not having much with living with the parents, you know? It is very tiring and stressful here sometimes.

Bored

I was going to craft tonight, but the gal that was going to come bailed, so now I'm left with nothing to do and I spent money I probably shouldn't have spent. Now I'm in a depressed-ish mood and don't really feel like doing anything. To be truthful, I've been looking forward to this all day. I haven't actually had girl time for awhile so I was excited to hang out and get to know Brian's friend's wife a little better. Most of the girls I know have families of their own and have busy lifes, which I understand, so I don't hang out with the girls much. Perhaps I will just craft tomorrow instead before I have to go back to work on Thursday. I have a lot of pictures that need to be scrapbooked and put away, and some frames that need to be made.

Perhaps I can find something to amuse myself online somewhere...

Life

Well, Brian is now unemployed. My boss is going to give him a job, but that won't go through for a week or two. It is going to be hard to go back to not having any money to do stuff. All our money has to go toward paying bills. On the bright side, I only have to work in Provo for two more days. Then I get to work here in salt lake again. I am so happy. The drive down there is miserable and hot and slow.

I don't know what is going to happen, but hopefully everything will go well. It has to...I can't take anymore stress.

Sweet and Sour Chicken

In association with my previous post, I have decided to begin my recipe thing I talked about forever ago. The first is Sweet and Sour Chicken. I got this from my mother in law, and I love it!

4-6 chicken breast
1 small bottle Russian Dressing
1 jar Apricot preserves
1 packet Onion Soup mix (or you can use 2-3 tbsp beef boullion and 2-3 tbsp dry onion flakes. That's what I do.)

Place the chicken in the bottom of the pan or crockpot. Mix the dressing, soup mix, and Apricots and pour over the top.

Bake at 350 for 1 hour until chicken is done. Crockpot- high for 4 hours, or low 6-8 hours.

Serve over rice with steamed veggies on the side. Delicious!

It's been awhile

Well, I decided not to take the job in Provo. Brian and I prayed about it and stuff, and we don't feel like now is the time for us to move. At least that far away. Also, a manager in particular (I'm sure you guys can figure out who I am talking about) at the Sam's club there treats me like I don't know anything. He tells me I need to show leadership skills and he is going to ask my team how they like me and how they think I am doing. I don't even work for him, so it is really none of his business. He just makes me so mad. Anyway, I don't want to have to feel like i am going to be in trouble for everything I do or don't do to his standards. He's the kind of guy that would call my district manager if he thought he was right and I was wrong, and I really don't want to deal with that kind of stress being a new manager and all. It's not worth the pay for that. Especially because of all the trouble we have had with Brian's work lately, too.

Brian's aunt and uncle came up from Pheonix this weekend. His Grandma and Grandpa moved here from Pheonix maybe a month and a half ago? something like that. It was actually very nice to meet them. I haven't met many from Brian's side of the family. They live all over the place. :D We're having a BBQ with all of them tomorrow night that should be fun. Bri's grandma just had surgery too this last week. She had her carotid artery scraped out, but I was glad to see that she was feeling better today. We took her some flowers and stuff. I think she liked them. She is very quiet, but i like her a lot.

It has been a long week. So much has gone on all over the place that I feel like I am barely catching up with stuff. I dislike working so far away. By the time I get home i literally have to go to bed so I can get up early the next morning and do it all over again...bleh.

I've got to start cooking a lot this week. When Kim leaves to go to school, I will be cooking for just me and Bri everynight and some nights I don't want to cook cook, you know? I'd rather have something i already made and pop it in the oven from the freezer. Brian used to do that for me when we were on our own, so I imagine he can handle that. ;) It will be nice to make things my way again.

BLAH...

is exactly how I feel about everything today.

I'm glad that Brian is feeling better. We ended up having to take him in early in the morning hours on Thursday because he was so sick. The Dr didn't know what he had, except for he had all the signs and symptoms of appendicitis, but his blood count came back normal. It could just be that his appendix flared up and went away and then flared up again. Weird, huh?

Work went by without incident...for the most part. There is one lady that we just hired that I cannot stand. She refuses to listen to me because "i'm not her boss." When my boss isn't there, I am her boss, so she'll have to get used to it. She witches about everything. And she plays the pity me card all the time. They lost their house and they both lost their jobs, but that's no excuse for playing the pity me card. I bought lunch today and she was whining that she didn't have any money to buy anything. Then she tells me to buy her lunch because she has no money, and obviously I do because I bought lunch. I was mad. I may have bought her lunch if she hadn't been so rude. You don't just tell people to buy you something. So I told her i didn't have any money to buy her lunch with because I have bills to pay, too. She got pissed, but seriously.

One of the Manager's for Sam's side is being really vindictive lately. We had an accident and runined their year + accident free days and he's been on a relentless tirade ever since. He's putting a security camera in our kitchen and he thinks he can send us home for making mistakes or doing things we shouldn't do. We don't even work for him. Somedays I wonder what his deal is.

Oy. I'm typing so late because I can't sleep. I have so many things running through my mind tonight. I can'tget it to shut up. People at work tell me things because I am a "boss," i have a lot of personal things going through my mind, and I have been thinking about a conversation I had with someone earlier today. I really hate it when your mind thinks faster than you can keep up. I think that is why I can't get to sleep.

I guess I better try. I do have to be back to work bright and early...Bleh

Stiches

I was going to spend the day packing stuff to go to storage, doing laundry and getting my bedroom reorganized, but no...Christy's little guy has to go get stiches. He fell and hit his head on her bed frame and now he needs stiches. Poor little guy. So I have Alex, her older one here with me and he is watching Bolt.

Brian was up all night throwing up so neither one of us really got any sleep. I'm hoping that it is just food poisoning and not an actual bug. Everybody here was just sick with all that crap, and I was lucky enough to miss getting it. :)

I managed to split my toe ope today too. I hit it on my mom's china hutch and it split right open and bled a lot. We're all doing real good today...lol. I really should go and get some stuff done while Alex is preoccupied, until he gets bored that is.

The Longest Day of the Year

Believe you me, it has definately flet like the longest day of the year. Sadly, not the nice sunny days will become shorter bit by bit til its dark at 4 in the afternoon. I love the long days of summer, though I think this has been the worst summer yet, but I can still plan for some fun.

I had a better day today. I think that having a few days off to recooperate will do the trick nicely. It will be like a mini vacation that I really needed. I'm planning on crafting a bit because I have a lot to catch up on and not a lot of time to do it. I think that my stressful days (and past weeks) are soon to be calmer. I spent the last few weeks in and out of the dr's office trying to see if the lumps in my boobs were cancerous. Thankfully, they are nothing to be worried over, and I just have to deal with some irritating pain in the area. I was stressed like you would not believe!

I was talking to a gal today about babies and what not. Its funny how some people think they have you pegged for certain things based off your personality or your religion. I hate how people think that you shouldn't have a baby because you can't afford it, or because you're not old enough. How the heck do they know how much money I have or how much I make a year? Seriously...it's none of thier business. For those who wonder, we make about 40k a year (which is what my parents raised 4 of us on) and when I get my raise/promotion we will make close to 60k a year. Personally, I think that is plenty to raise a kid on. It also irritates me that people assume that I will stay home with my kid and raise it just because I am LDS. If I could, I would, but with my new promotion, I would be STUPID to stay home. I'll be making the most money, so If one of us were to stay home, it would be brian and we would still make close to 35k a year from just me. Not that any of this matters because I'm not pregnant, nor have I been lucky enough to be pregnant yet. But Brian and I have thoroughly thought this out and budgeted (thanks to rough estimates from the siblings who already have kids) accordingly for when and if the time comes. I think I am going to make the Pregnancy topic off limits because people can't help but always give their advice and their ideas.

Anyway, tired of people telling me how I should do things and when I should do things.

What's in a Title?

Have you ever wished that you had crazy super powers and could shrink yourself into something so small that nobody could see you or talk to you or do anything to you? That has been my day today. Today was the first time I have felt like I was working for Sam's again and was feeling that same icky feeling and feeling of dread and despair in the pit of my stomach. I absolutely hated my job for the first time in months. It made me question if I was good enough for my promotion. It made me question if I would have the right answers, if I would be a good boss. It was an absolute nightmare. One of the ladies at my work actually told me she was afraid I might have a stroke today because I was so stressed, frustrated and angry. And then I think of how I have 2 days more until I have a blessed day off...and then I get frustrated all over again.

My car blew up the other day, literally...my thermostat blew up and my engine was freaking out and there was smoke and the smell of burning metal that only a car can have, you know? So now I am almost a hundred bucks down with a smoking car that smells like burning antifreeze. Yay. To complete it all, the check engine light is on, again. I love my car, I do, but somedays, I kinda wish it would blow up for real.

Bonfired with the friends tonight. It was nice to see them, especially Tony. I haven't seen him since I got married over a year and a half ago. I remember the bonfires we used to have years ago. They were fun and very relaxed. I didn't care if I had to work the next morning early or if I had early church. I'd still stay up til two or three in the morning. Ah, somedays I wish I could still stay up til then. :)

I've been in and out of dr's offices for the past three or four weeks trying to figure out what's wrong with me. So far it's nothing too serious, but then again, who knows. The baby thing still bothers me as its hard to feel like I'm a reject and not have people understand. Everybody always says give it time, it will happen. Which is fine, and I'm sure it will (I hope) but I get tired of hearing it. Then I get all the people who tellme I don't want to have a kid right now, wait til you're older. Thats fine for them too, but I truly feel in my heart that this is the right time to start my family. I've prayed, I've been to the temple about and it feels right...and has for the past year and a half. Time enough to have two babies and I still haven't even got pregnant. I don't like to really talk about it anymore...most people don't understand how I feel, don't want to understand how I feel. Almost everyone I know has gotten pregnant when they want to be. Its like wanting something so bad and you can't afford it ever...perhaps it is my trial in life, learning how to have patience too. perhaps I will close this book for now. Its a heated subject I'd rather not get into.

Sigh. There's a lot more that I want to say, but for the sake of the people who read my blog and for other reasons, I shall write in my private blog and blow off the steam there. I just wrote how I feel today. Who knows, maybe tomorrow will be excellent and I'll be gushing about having a great day. Until then, I'm not complaining, trying to get you to pity me, or even trying to make you feel bad...I'm just telling the truth about how i feel without sugarcoating it. Needed to clear my brain to make room for my day tomorrow.

I'm feeling slightly better today. I'm just watching the boys play Call of Duty. It is rather boring. I don't like the game, but whatever. I don't have anything better to do. I'm chatting to people, and writing in my blog.

Things have settled down around here. I've been feeling a bit off the last little while, but I feel a lot better today. I've been losing weight too, which makes me very happy. I think I may push my recipe thing off til next week, I have a dr's appointment to go to, and I don't think I will feel much like making something. The only thing I have stuff to make is a mixed berry pie anyway, and the recipe is in my head...maybe I'll make it anyway. I've been craving a berry pie. I just need some more berries. ;)

I know this post is random and boring, so I'm sorry. I'm just rambling because I am bored.

Still Bummed Out

So I didn't get my promotion. The DM gave it to his daughter under the pretense that she has been with the company longer than I have. Personally, I think that is a bunch of bull. I worked so hard in Murray the last few weeks to clean and make that place sparkle. And it was all for naught. In a way, I feel relieved. There were a few issues there with people that i wish I could say would blow over. Their lead (what I do) hates me and thinks I am taking over her job, which I kind of did, but only because my boss told me to train her how to be a lead. Another guy was just creepy and he made my skin crawl. How do you deal with people like that?

The next position open will be mine first, according to the DM, but it is in Provo, which means that i will be moving back there. While I will have the Provo gals back, I'll miss you guys here. I have a lot of praying and decision making to do in the next few weeks. It would be perfect for us to go there...Brian needs to transfer schools, and I would be making 30-35k a year, but is it the right decision to make right now? Seems how we don't have kids yet, the decision will be a bit easier to make. Living here with the parents is a hard thing to do, and I would like to have my own place again. Living here has made me feel like my life really has no purpose. I just exist from day to day, doing what I need to do without much happiness. Thank heaven for Brian. He makes me so happy. He literally gives me the strength I need to make it through.

I watched Julia and Julie the other day. I know this is lame, but I am going to steal ideas from that julie person. I am going to find a new recipe a week and make it and blog about it. Just to you guys, but I think it will make me feel like I have something to do and something to look forward to doing.

Wow...my life is boring. I do facebook, I read and I work. I need to get out more. I remember I used to drive around just because I wanted to drive around. I would randomly make stupid stuff to eat because I didn't care what was in it or how many calories it had. I would buy a shirt at the mall and I didn't care if it was the last of my money for the week. Oy. I suppose if I were completely blissfully happy I wouldn't like it either. I think that what I am lacking is my sense of being myself. Does that make sense? Living here makes me feel like I have to do things a certain way, be somebody else. I'm done with that.

Bummed Out

Everyone is either pregnant or having kids, except me. It makes me feel like a reject among my friends, though that certainly won't be the first time I've felt like that. I'm beginning to wonder if there is something wrong with me. We have been trying for a year and a half to get pregnant and every month, nothing ever happens. Every time I start, I get a pang of disappointment followed by, "Well, maybe next month." But next month it is always the same. I think I will utilize my time instead on making myself a better person and losing lots of weight. Perhaps having a baby is not for me. I've quit school. I'm not really sure what I want to spend the rest of my life doing, but I don't want to demo forever. Perhaps if I get that manager job, Brian and I could buy a house. That would be nice. I have missed having my own space and being able to do whatever I want to do. I've missed being able to pull my craft stuff out for days at a time, and just work on stuff, but here, I have to immediately put it all away. I feel like I can never get anything done. Sorry this is a whiny and pity me post...just feeling a bit depressed today, I guess.

Busy Week

So i just found out today that my boss has not paid me for the last few days that I've worked 8+ hours a day and she's only paid me for 6. I'm missing a whole 80 dollars. That really pisses me off.

I also may be getting a promotion at my work to be a manager like my boss. She thinks I can do it, and I hope she's right. I have been second guessing myself like crazy. I have an interview next week, but until then, I will be working in the murray store (where I will be posted) and stuff taking care of everything. I will be the boss. I think they want to see how I do before they give me an interview. I will have to work 40 hours a week for a salary of 30K a year. I will have to work seven days a week til I get things up and running, and i'll have to work some sundays a month. I was hoping to still have sundays off, but for 30K a year, I think I can handle at least one. ;)

Anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know...wish me luck!